p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize