My liver just broke up with me...
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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