What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize