saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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