the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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