does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
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Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
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I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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