I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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