I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize