Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Randomize