That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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