Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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