im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
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Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
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With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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