Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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