i don't plan on having that self control this summer
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick has a subreddit
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
where are my eyebrows?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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