We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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