just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize