I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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