mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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