So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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