forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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