some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
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