Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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