I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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