There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
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And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
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i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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