So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize