how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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