Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize