at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize