do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
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I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
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The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
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