Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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