rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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