32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just gift wrapped bread.
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I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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