I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
You did what with his pubic hair?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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