Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
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I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
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If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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