4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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