1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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