THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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