the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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