shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
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