I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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