Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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