Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize