you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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