Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
being pregnant is like rehab
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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