I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
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