She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize