just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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