hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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