I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to make out with him forever
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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