I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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